Phone home

Last night I was doing a set at an open mic, placed my phone on the table in front of the stage to record the audio of my set and half way through my set, noticed my phone was gone. Someone stole my phone! We ransacked the bar, called it, had the bouncer pat down remaining patrons to no avail. The phone battery had died or the phone had been shut off. We had a pretty good idea who took it and I could see a lynch mob forming.

I mourned my phone all day, changed passwords, filed a police report, initiated GPS tracking on it; it sucked. I had a show tonight, but after, I was going to go back to the bar and hope and pray someone found it and turned it in. People reminded me that thieves don’t typically return the items they steal.

I walked into the bar, said hi to the employee at the door, Luke, nice guy. Explained the situation to him and he searched the back of the bar. No phone. I fight back tears, succumb to the fact that I have to pay for a new phone and almost leave. Luke asks me what happened. I start to tell him the story and about the guy we suspected of stealing the phone and how he seemed very drunk. Luke says it’s funny how that guy seems to be there every night in a different body and how you really can’t trust people anymore.

A guy kind of bumps into me and as I turn to see who it is I see the face of the man who stole my phone. It was him! I try to gesture to Luke “omg that’s him, get him!” but for the first time in a long time I’m speechless! I can’t get words to leave my face! Ninja skills, react! Take him down… nothing… I’m in utter shock. Then I hear the perp say “hey I was here for comedy last night and somehow ended up with this phone…” and he pulls my phone out of his pocket.

Serendipitous that I was there just as he arrived to return it. After he left, Luke and I looked at each other like, no way that totally just happened! My faith in humanity is restored and omg I got my phone back, yay!

Now to go change all my passwords back to something I remember.

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